FILL YOUR THOUGHTS

There was a patch of quicksand at the farm. It was not much as quicksand goes, hardly more than a couple of yards across at any place. And I seem to remember that we hit hard ground at about thigh-deep even when we were this high ourselves.

We never called it ‘the farm’ then. It was ‘home’. Much later, when colleges and professions started claiming our children, it started becoming an economic alternative called ‘the farm’. A whole lot of hearts still beat to the desire of spending our evening years there.

Sinking in a couple of feet took more than a minute. The loss of control, the futility of struggling against the cloying mush that threatened to suck one in against one’s will; oh our little hearts knew panic! But after the first few times we learned to enjoy it. Our mothers would be angry, but we had more faith in life then than they had. We had not yet experienced flood and drought and disease and danger, and fear, real fear that probably clutches at the one who once again holds her eight – year old dying with some unknown ailment.

When official documents ask for a ‘permanent home’, almost all of us still write the farm address.

It was common to see someone sitting by a patch of crop gazing aimlessly into the depths of green and brown. It now brings to the imagination a body sitting in a Japanese garden empty of all thought, just feeling, just being, one with the garden, one with His will, one with the hum of Nature, getting up at length to place a small stone under the falling water just to change its tone a little bit to make the melody softer, then sitting down again; without plans, without blueprints, without design, just being.

Ever so often, we would spend a hot sultry afternoon dozing in the deep shade of the old 'pakhar' tree. The drone of the insects, the breeze cooled by the depth of the shade, the chirrups and caws of birds as they played within the immense canopy, the little ants that would crawl over us and often bite for want of anything better to do, the soft snore of our own breath as we bordered on the verge of consciousness…..

…..always, contentment seemed to lie at the verge bordering consciousness and oblivion.

The race for consciousness, the belief in one’s own power to achieve, the stress of planning and providing, the stuffing of one’s existence with self-reliance and self-importance, the glare of ego and conceit, all blind us to the need to surrender to inter-dependence, to love, to powers beyond one’s imagination, to the forces of nature, to harmony, to the hand of god.

We are too conscious of ourselves, of our appearance, of our age, of our knowledge, wisdom, strength, education, office, rank, status, relationships, health, thoughts, plans, targets, achievements; self-importance.

Contentment lies on the far side of conscious thought.

Which day in our lives has gone exactly as we planned and given us exactly what we desired? Has the waywardness of life deprived us or enriched us? Do we believe that we have control over sufficient external and internal factors to plan out every moment of our lives? Does that mean that we even control the thought, word and deeds of each individual or entity that has any effect on our lives? Can we actually fathom how small and insignificant are our plans and conquests in the vast vistas of time, space and energy? Can we understand that the only reason for our ‘existence’ is that we are a speck in the Perfection of a much larger canvas?

Must we die to learn that we have not lived?

The secret is to lose consciousness of the self, the ego, and merge with the larger picture, to acknowledge the Hand of the Painter and not try to take over the canvas, to wonder at His work and admire all parts of the picture that make it whole and beautiful.

We constantly fill our thoughts with plans and worries. We often feel guilty to leave our conscious thoughts blank. Can we, then, deliberately fill our heart and soul and consciousness with His name, crowd out and smother all other conscious thoughts? And rely on Him to take care?

Can we fill our being with His presence and let Him guide our actions?

Can we just remember constantly that He Is, and we are not!

“Zeina Glo brings you the radiant glow of inner peace, good health and attendant beauty.

Zeina Glo helps you strip off layers of inhibitions, hesitation, and cynicism, allowing your thoughts and emotions to flow freely.

Zeina Glo helps to douse the flames of insecurity and guilt, to open the windows of mind and body to the cool fresh breeze of love.

Zeina Glo encourages you to spread inner peace, good health, radiance, exuberance, warmth, joy and the glow from your inner being.

Zeina Glo brings the beauty of your own thoughts back to you!!”

For, questions, criticism or advice, please post comments here, or write to zeinaglo@rediffmail.com or zeinaglow@gmail.com