Righteousness is a suit of armour. The
righteous suffer a lot of opposition and dissent. They are often victims of
fraud, cheating, abuse, castigation and many other forms of physical and
psychological challenges. But they are also shielded by the confidence of being
‘right’.
Some righteous people understand that the
characteristic of being right is a blessing which has been bestowed upon them. Many
are irked by the absence of their own reflection in each face they see, and when
they become judgemental, the virtue of righteousness changes shade to become the
malaise of self-righteousness.
The righteous person is in a position to feel
and practice compassion, forgiveness and love; unless the idea of his own goodness
goes to his head and he becomes guilty of conceit. The self-righteous ones become cynical and overlook to remember that
they are in a position where they can feel compassion for those
who are not so lucky.
Blessed are they that can forgive; forgive not
as a favour bestowed upon the object of their forgiveness, but as a form of
liberating themselves from the shackles of being judgemental, of bearing a
grudge, of the burden of tolerating someone morally inferior. The favour of
forgiveness is bestowed more upon oneself than upon the object of one’s
forgiveness. Forgiveness cleanses the forgiver, giving him pride in tolerance,
understanding, compassion and, finally, love.
Much has been said about forgiveness as a gift
or a blessing to be given. But there is another face of forgiveness that is equally,
if not more important; that of asking forgiveness!
One who is ridden with misgivings and guilt is
not encased in the shell of righteousness. He is naked and vulnerable, weak in
the knowledge of his guilt, stripped of his self-confidence. At the first sign
of misgivings about some thought, word or action, he is prey to remorse. Remorse
goes hand in hand with guilt and self-derision.
The remorse and uncertainty of being wrong are
far more defeating than the frustration felt at others for being wrong when one
knows what is right. The heavy shackles of guilt and remorse can only be broken
by kindness and faith. Kindness to oneself in forgiving one’s fault, and faith
in god and goodness, enough to build up the courage to ask forgiveness of those
one has wronged.
Not forgiving oneself, not being compassionate
and kind to oneself, is as bad as not forgiving others. Forgive, and make a
fresh start.
Asking forgiveness is much more difficult than
giving it. This is primarily because it must rely on the goodness of others
rather than one’s own.
It is not easy, this business of asking
forgiveness. It is far easier to try and justify one’s wrong than to forgive
oneself or ask forgiveness of others.
One way would be to go about it slowly,
deliberately. One could start by analysing and recognizing the possible effects
of one’s transgression. One could go on to argue and quarrel with God for
making it happen. Then one could thank God for making it happen because it has
made one realize one’s helplessness in the face of guilt and hope in the power of God
to rescue. Soon one would be able to appreciate God’s design and
forgive oneself. As understanding dawned, it would become clear that there is
no personal guilt, in the same way as there is no personal righteousness; only the Grand Design. It would be a short step then to forgive oneself and ask forgiveness of
God.
These are both within the person, and easier to
get at than the final stage, that of asking forgiveness from those who have
been aggrieved or wronged. One runs the risk of rejection. But it may be
remembered that once the asking is done, the burden is transferred to the
giver. It is now his choice to forgive and start afresh, or to dwell upon time
that has flowed by. This forgiveness is the one most difficult to ask for, and
the most rewarding when received!
“Zeina Glo brings you
the radiant glow of inner peace, good health and attendant beauty.
Zeina Glo helps you strip off layers
of inhibitions, hesitation, and cynicism, allowing your thoughts and emotions
to flow freely.
Zeina Glo helps to douse the flames
of insecurity and guilt, to open the windows of mind and body to the cool fresh
breeze of love.
Zeina Glo encourages you to
spread inner peace, good health, radiance, exuberance, warmth,
joy and the glow from your inner being.
Zeina Glo brings the beauty of your
own thoughts back to you!!”
For, questions,
criticism or advice, please post comments here, or write to zeinaglo@rediffmail.com or zeinaglow@gmail.com
